Resuming sex after pregnancy
Pregnancy, birth and newborn babies bring on a flurry of questions and inevitably you will come to ask the question about resuming sex post birth. Here are our tips for getting in the mood!
- Talk to each other about how you feel.
- Be gentle with each other and build up to things gradually. Light touches are a great way to start. Use some massage oil and give each other a slow, sensual massage. This can help you explore each other and re-connect sexually.
- Avoid penetration and concentrate on kissing, touching, caressing and oral sex the first few times. This helps you to build confidence in yourself as a sexual person post-baby.
- Use a lubricant if you need to - especially with condoms. It can be best to delay sex until you naturally lubricate.
- Let your partner know if you experience any vaginal tenderness or pain.
- Choose a position where you can control the depth and rate of penetration. Only you can tell what feels pleasurable or painful.
- It can be difficult to switch off from household chores and focus on your partner. Make a list of whatever needs to be done, turn the phones on silent, ensure that your baby is fed and settled, and then set about focusing on each other.
- You can help get in the mood by pampering yourself and doing things that make you feel special and a desirable being. Maybe get a facial or manicure or buy some lingerie.
Read our article on Sex after baby and discuss issues and your body after baby with Essential Baby members.
Melissa is an Essential Baby member and an independent midwife and consultant.
