Me with Patrick & Filipe - Jon with Rafa
Oh boy, if you think this was a journey till now, be seated for this chapter and next one.
So after buying the super breast pump on Saturday we came to visit the boys. Our first day in the hospital as visitors. It has been a weird night as yesterday, when we left the hospital ,we didn't get to take our boys with us. It's a very weird feeling, ask any multiple mum, devastating, to enter the hospital with a big belly and leave only with flowers and no babies at all its just not right.
So we were quite upset but all good. Seems that's the only way with multiples.
I didn't feel very well overnight and as our obstetrician was in the hospital that next day so we thought why not see him quickly for a chat.
Well... after talking to him, doing some exams there I was being admitted back to the hospital. Part of me is not all that sad as once again we are close to our little boys. Rafael is still not improving much so it's nice to be back here, close to him.
Plus, I wasn't feeling that well anyway, one week since the caesarean and I still don' walk much, my water retention got worse, and I have some problems breathing, especially at night.
Dr. Mark ordered some exams immediately. Some x-rays of my lungs, blood, heart, lots of things... By the end of it I was getting comfy on my new room waiting Jon who went out to bring a celebratory Sushi and clothes when a different doctor comes in.
He explains he is the expert recommended by Dr. Mark to be in charge of me. He doesn't explain much what he thinks is happening (as most doctors wouldn't). He mainly says I had water in my lungs which is compromising my breathing and there is a lot of exams and care that will be required. There is lots of things he wants to eliminate and investigate. He wants me transferred immediately to another hospital where he believes I will have the right specialists around me.
I felt quite sad and angry but had to obey the doctor's orders a bit against my will. I just don't understand what is happening. I was put in a wheel chair and wheeled over to another hospital, gladly a building very close, not as welcoming as a maternity ward and quite far from the boys... Actually a little detail here... to be more accurate, I am now on a CARDIO Ward Unit.
As soon as I got there things were plugged in my body to monitor my heart. I was also introduced to the ICU doctor... so you can imagine my fear... they want me here for my heart? What does that mean?
This was a Saturday; I could barely eat the celebratory sushi Jon went to pick up... I was ever so scared in my life. Each nurse that came to my room I asked If I was going to die... I cried loads, and Jon stayed by my side, trying not to be too worried (later on I found it he knew much more than me but decided to keep quite to avoid scaring me more).
At the same time Rafael's situation is not improving much.
Dark days for us... from being over the top of the moon we come down like a rock from the skies. Me in the Cardio Ward and Rafael probably to be transferred to another hospital to do a very dangerous procedure for a 33 week premature baby: dialysis.
That night I didn't sleep at all. Worried with myself and little Rafa... the hours in this hospital seems to take days, especially being a weekend.
The tasks are also very serious, the machines in my body; I have never been to a hospital before the pregnancy and now had done the caesarean and this. I am scared, seriously scared!
Not much doctor action that Sunday but got some here and there, some exams, some brief talks... I am starting to understand a bit more about my conditions but things are not that clear yet. I am seeing a kidney, heart and blood specialists. Blood exams everyday, blood pressure, heart rate and temperature every hour.
The machine monitoring my heart which I carry everywhere still scares me.
Monday arrived, (thank God)
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