The importance of welcoming everyone into your 'mum tribe'

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"Not everyone has the luxury of a village." 

The statement is simple enough - but it is one which can easily overlooked by mums fortunate enough to be surrounded by a supportive group of friends as they muddle through motherhood.

Now, a Facebook post detailing the struggle of the mums on the outside of those firm social circles has hit a nerve around the world. 

"If you're at a playgroup/baby group/ class or at the park, or wherever, and another mum strikes up conversation with you, don't be a total cow about it," Jemima Keys wrote in the post which has been copied and shared by thousands.

"Especially if you're with your mates, and shes sat on her own.

"Especially if you know the everyone in the room, but shes clearly new and nervous.

"Talk back. It doesn't matter what you say just say something. Be NICE."

Jemima said that judgment about what other mums looks like or if they don't seem like you you're kind of person, should be cast aside.

"Because for all you know that mum has been in tears all morning trying to get her and her kids to that baby group just so she can feel like shes achieved something today," she wrote.


"For all you know, getting to the park today was the first time shes left the house in 48 hours and shes desperate to talk to anyone.

"For all you know, that mum doesn't have a single friend in the area, no family to call on, and her husband works long hours… and shes just trying to make a bl**dy friend.

"For all you know, shes been trying for 18 months to make friends with other mums only to find that everyone already has a "tribe" and they don't need new members….so it too a lot of balls to say hello to you."

The mum goes on to say you don't have to be their best friend, just be kind.

"But if you can just make a tiny tiny bit of effort…include that woman in your conversation, ask her name, and say hi next time you see her it might actually make a huge, HUGE difference to someones life," she wrote.

"It literally could pull that mum out of her depression…make her feel seen.

"Like shes not a total loser, and maybe shes worth talking to, worth being friends with, has value as an adult and not just an invisible appendage to her child."

Her message was embraced by other mums, who also shared their own experiences dealing with loneliness, isolation and exclusion.

"I was put off a lot of baby groups when my little girl was younger because I have a lot of tattoos and piercings, I was judged a lot and made to feel alone!!" commented one mum.

"I take my granddaughter to playgroup sometimes and the mums don't even say hello or nod," wrote a grandmother.

This motherhood caper is hard work and the popularity of Jemima's sentiments shows kindness, toward all parents, could make all the difference.