Why I won't be following this bizarre parenting trend

 Photo: Getty Images

Take notice parents, there's a new baby trend that you need to be aware of so you don't offend others who might have embraced it.

Before you pick up your child and most definitely before you pick up another person's child you must ask for the baby's permission.

Obviously, limitations will make it tricky, because babies do not talk, but as one mother explains you can just "feel" the response.

"Since the moment he was born, we've always asked before we pick him up," Nisha Moodley, from San Fransico, said in her Facebook post.

"I always 'feel' for his yes. Why? Because we want him to know that his body is his, and that others' bodies are theirs, and no one gets to make choices about someone else's body."

She then offers advice to people wanting to pick up other people's babies.

"Sidenote: If you ever want to hold someone else's baby, my suggestion is to ask the parent, then ask the kid," she wrote.

"It always touches my heart when someone takes a moment to connect with him and says "Can I hold you, dude?"."

Sounds crazy, because it is a little. C'mon, I feel like parenting is getting out of control.


The premise of this idea is one I strongly support. Raising children to have control and ownership over their own bodies is vital.

When they get to the age of understanding, not forcing them to hug, kiss or cuddle others is important. Teaching them about their bodies and not letting people touch them in ways they feel uncomfortable is, without a doubt, helping to keep them safe. And ensuring they never touch other people in inappropriate ways or without consent is also essential.

The part about this new trend that makes me shake my head is, having to ask your own baby if you can pick them up, mainly because they can't reply. They don't talk yet.

They can't use their big kid voice, because they don't speak. Or when they can speak, they don't always want to use their words.

I don't know if I could "feel" their reply. What if I get it wrong?

While they're screaming in the middle of the night or gasping for air when having an asthma attack or making a run for it over a busy road – do I really need to stop and ask their permission to pick them up? Really? What if they "say" no?

To the mum who wrote this Facebook post, I think it is a lovely idea for you to introduce to your family unit. It's working for you and that makes me happy.

But to the parents out there who already have so much to worry about, don't feel you have to add this to your list of ever increasing parenting requirements. Just keeping doing what works for you and your family.